Crappy Children's Art Book

Product Description

Previously published as I Am Better Than Your Kids.

From the New York Times bestselling author of The Alphabet of Manliness, the creator of “The Best Page in the Universe,” and overall genius, comes an outrageous, laugh-out-loud critique of children’s artwork that finally cuts those little smug know-it-alls down to size.

What people are saying about Maddox and Crappy Children's Art:

“You’re a menace to healthy development in children.”

“You’re right up there with Hitler, who destroyed thousands of kids’ lives by taking out their parents in concentration camps.”

“Saying you are better than a child just makes you a coward.”

“No one said you had to look at the artwork from your co-worker’s kids. To make an entire book to bash it? Sad.”

“would u like it if u were, like, 4, nd u do a picture nd u work on it for ages, nd u feel really proud, nd ur parents put it in their office, then sum asshole goes and says it’s crap, nd says it’s an F grade. Think about it.”

Top Reviews

Love Hard Hitting Satire? Then Don't Miss This!
by Mike (5 out of 5 stars)
April 12, 2015

The one man wrecking crew behind The Best Page in the Universe and best-selling author of The Alphabet of Manliness is back! (Brief note: this book was formerly published with the title of I Am Better than Your Kids) This time he's here to remind both the pint-sized narcissists living in the US (i.e. US children) and deluded adults (whether they be parents or not), that the former's "masterpieces" are simply fulsome rubble. He does this through his signature blend of great writing, unsparing wit, and profanity. You should get this book if any of the following apply: 1) You're a fan of Maddox. 2) You like it when someone calls a spade a spade. 3) You have a funny bone that hasn't been surgically removed. 4) It irritates you when you're trying to appreciate actual art and hear someone say "my kid could make that." You should not get this book if you're a parent who thinks your offspring is going to become the next Rembrandt, Goya, Cassatt, Picasso, etc. and/or you're easily offended.
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Your Child Sucks
by Ben (5 out of 5 stars)
January 24, 2013

I love this book. Page after page of insightful critiques of real children's artwork, Maddox says what we're all thinking. How often have you heard a friend go on and on about how talented and gifted their child is and struggled to holdback the urge to set them straight? This book says all those things we've thought in the past and puts those little snots in their place. No you won't be the next Di Vinci. Not even close little guy.

I first read this book on my Kindle and loved it. Later I bought this physical copy for my brother for Christmas. Looking through it, the Kindle book isn't anywhere as awesome as this copy with color pictures and larger layout. My brother loved the book and started reading it even before we finished unwrapping the rest of the presents (his wife with a baby on the way was less excited than he was).

A truly great book for anyone that has followed Maddox for year and those that have never heard of him.
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Hilarious
by kain35 (5 out of 5 stars)
March 28, 2013

One of the funniest things I've ever read, I laughed the entire time I was flipping through it. I've been a longtime fan of Maddox' work and this book was well done. I expected a quick 50 page pamphlet; this book was 300 pages organized by artwork category and very well put together. I brought it in to work and it was a huge hit among my coworkers with kids. You must have a sense of humor to enjoy this book. Do not read if you're easily offended or think every creation your kid makes is pure gold. As someone who was awful at art growing up, I can fully appreciate all of this terrible artwork.
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Good to make you laugh when you need to.
by Steve Frock (5 out of 5 stars)
January 25, 2017

There's nothing wrong with this book. Maddox? Maybe. Likely.

But that's why I read his stuff. It makes me feel like my miseries aren't the only miseries in this world. And I can giggle when I most need to.
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Good bathroom reading
by wmcksmith (5 out of 5 stars)
January 3, 2018

Awesome book. I wish that I could find it so that I could finish looking at it. Funny comments
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Very funny!! Would be nice on the coffee table ...
by Katrm (5 out of 5 stars)
April 7, 2015

Christmas Gift, my son and I spent a long time reading and laughing before wrapping it up. This book was requested for Christmas. Very funny!! Would be nice on the coffee table or at a vacation property. Even as a gift for someone who is down just to make them laugh.
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Maddox says what everyone else really thinks of children's "art"
by Amazon Customer (5 out of 5 stars)
September 29, 2013

I remember when I was in school, I would walk by the elementary classrooms and the teachers would have their student's drawings outside on display for everyone to admire. All of the drawings were so awful, but at the same time praised by the teachers. Because of that praise the drawings every week were just as bad as the ones before it. The kids need to know the truth or they will never aspire to be any better, and that's exactly what Maddox has done here. I gave it 5 stars, because it wouldn't let me give it 10..
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Five Stars
by Rebecca P. (5 out of 5 stars)
October 23, 2017

Makes for a great gift
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Any review I could write would not be worthy of ...
by J. Parker IV (5 out of 5 stars)
August 20, 2015

Any review I could write would not be worthy of the god-like being that is Maddox. To read this book is to accept a gift from our fair leader, the aforementioned Maddox.
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...Funny book filled with bad artwork...
by Kathy M. (5 out of 5 stars)
April 13, 2013

...Reminds me of all the times we've looked at a child's attempt at capturing the world around them and wonder where they saw that nightmare. Makes you glad they aren't in charge of the universe...

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