How Not To Kill Your Baby Book

Product Description

Keeping your baby alive is no easy task. They are weak, defenseless, and act like little drunk people. To help you on this daunting task is the 'How Not To ... [Read more]

Top Reviews

A lifesaver--literally.
by Kaylee Marsh (5 out of 5 stars)
July 11, 2016

This was a GREAT gift for my sister and brother in law as they were preparing to have their first baby. I would highly suggest it for all the soon to be parents that take life too seriously, as well as those who just like to laugh. A great relief from all of the other "serious" parenting books that are out there. Now if their baby survives to the age of 18, I can take all the credit!
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funny but lacking in some ways
by Kyliak (4 out of 5 stars)
March 6, 2013

I have the kindle verson and its funny but lacking.

first there are several pictures such as how to install a carseat. This could be funny but there is no way to zoom in and view the diagram so as a kindle reader it and many other diagrams were unreadable.

in addition while it was funny it was pretty short. I read it aloud on a roadtrip and we finshed in in about 1.5 hours.

finaly while it was funny i found the cover misleading I expected more good/bad photos and there wernt any.

with that being said it was a funny book and i enjoyed reading it.
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I wish I'd gotten this for my baby shower
by Emily (5 out of 5 stars)
March 29, 2012

How Not to Kill Your Baby isn't a parenting book; it's a parody of the parenting books we all read that gave us important and serious advice like: never put your child in a stroller lest he not learn to walk, cement all your bookshelves to the wall, and train your baby to go to sleep on her own because otherwise you'll need to show up every night at her college dorm to rock her to sleep.

I went back after I read the book and reread all the "Dan" sidebars. "Dan" underscores the sexist and insulting way the parenting industry demeans the father and expects the mother to be perfect.

This book might have been far more useful to me as a new parent than all the serious baby guides. Had I gotten it as a shower gift, it would have made me laugh at how seriously I was taking the whole thing and how insane the babycare industry has gotten.
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I bought this for my best friend who accidentally killed his first four newborns
by Chad Allen Houston (5 out of 5 stars)
February 17, 2016

I bought this for my best friend who accidentally killed his first four newborns. After receiving this book, the next two he had survived and are still alive! One is three years old, the other one year old! Definitely worth the investment if you don't want dead kids!
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My Baby Survived!
by 53GR Images (5 out of 5 stars)
June 26, 2014

I was going to say something witty, but the other reviewers have all beaten me to the punch. Quite simply, this book is irreverent and hilarious. As long as you don't get offended too easily, this will help relieve some of the considerable stress of knowing that your life will soon be fundamentally altered forever (i.e. - your wife is going to give birth).
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Maybe my expectations were too high but I thought the ...
by Kerry Maloney (2 out of 5 stars)
August 23, 2015

Maybe my expectations were too high but I thought the book would be funnier than it is. The cover is the funniest part of the book.
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Five Stars
by Nick (5 out of 5 stars)
July 31, 2017

Awesome gag gift. Got it for my sister's baby shower and she loved it.
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No dead babies yet! =D
by Sarah Miller (5 out of 5 stars)
January 7, 2016

Ever since I purchased this book my child has, I'm happy to report, NOT died. This fantastic piece of literature does not fail to deliver. It's (literally) a life-saver!
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Should be required reading
by RJswanee,Top Contributor: Pets (5 out of 5 stars)
May 17, 2013

Did you know that you shouldn't give your baby a real bear; you should give them a TEDDY bear? I KNOW RIGHT NEITHER DID I UNTIL I READ THIS WORK OF GENIUS

This book has literally saved the lives of my future children. It is chock full of valuable tidbits of information that most of us mere mortals just don't think about when it comes to parenting. I thought I was moderately prepared for motherhood before I picked this glorious gem up for a friend's baby shower - boy, was I wrong!

How many poor, innocent children could be spared every year if everyone thinking of becoming a parent was strapped to a chair and forced to memorize this invaluable work? PLEASE THINK OF THE CHILDREN AND BUY THIS BOOK
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great gift
by Amazon Customer (5 out of 5 stars)
March 1, 2017

great gag gift for my friend who is hopefully having a baby soon.

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